Things Jesus NEVER said...

I found this list on Tumblr and just had to share it with y’all. The point of this is not to depress you, but to encourage you by showing you how silly we can be as believers when we complicate the most simple things. I hope it encourages you J

Things Jesus never said:

1.      “For God was so disgusted with the world and you that He gave His one and only son.”

2.     “I have come to bring you a new religion.”

3.      “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have correct theology.”

4.     “If anyone would come after me, let him disparage all other religions and their followers.”

5.      “If you love me, you will regularly attend church…within reason.”

6.     “Blessed are the tithers for they shall be called children of God.

7.      “Thy kingdom come, thy will be done in Heaven after the earth goes up in flames and is destroyed.”

8.      “You have heard it said, ‘Love your neighbor,’ which means the people with whom you attend church and relate to in your Christian sub-culture.”

9.     “In my Father’s house there are a limited number of rooms. But no worries, there is plenty of room in Hell.”

10.    “The kingdom of God has come!...Well, not exactly. I mean, not completely. Lets face it, the really-real kingdom comes after we die. Hang in there, it won’t be long.”

11.    “And you will know the truth and the truth will make you superior to all the other simpletons who never learned Greek or Hebrew.”

12.   “You are the light of the world…well…in a sinful-filthy-scum kind of way.”

13.    “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you a checklist of things to do and not do in order to remain in God’s favor.”

14.   “For God so loved the world…you know like theoretically…as in, God loves the big ‘W’ –world. But when it comes to you specifically, there are quite a few things that would need to change for God to actually and specifically love…or even like…YOU.”

15.    “He appeared to His disciples over a period of 40 days and spoke about how to incorporate His life teaching as a 501©3, and go into all the earth to build mega-churches in His name.”